The Book List

So at the end of 2010 I decided I was going to keep track of all the books I read during 2011. I bought a nifty book journal to write down all the titles and authors and when I read the books and even my thoughts about them. I managed to do that for about seven books. After that, I lost track of how long it took me to finish some books because it took me over a month to finish a few of them. But I still managed to keep track of which books I read and I decided I'm going to list them here. I'll even tell you my favorites so you can read them too, or tell me whether you liked them if you've already read them.

The list isn't in any particular order. Basically just how they were stacked on my shelves and floor as I finished them. And the books listed are the books I actually finished. I started a few others during the year that I just couldn't get through for one reason or another. I'm something of a picky reader when it comes to published books. I like good writing, and the more good writing I read, the harder it is for me to read writing that bugs me for some reason. So this list is only of the books I've finished in 2011. Also, this is only lists fiction. I've read a few non-fiction titles this year, but I'm not going to list them here. I may put them in another list later, though.

I will put an asterisk (*) by the books I really, really liked. I will put an ® by the books the I reread this year (books that I've already previously read but decided to read again for whatever reason).

*Poison Study - Maria V. Snyder
®Terrier - Tamora Pierce
Behemoth - Scott Westerfeld
Leviathan - Scott Westerfeld
Lemonade Mouth - Mark Peter Hughes
Fire - Kristin Cashore
The Read Pyramid - Rick Riordan
*The Lost Hero - Rick Riordan
*Hex Hall - Rachel Hawkins
*Demonglass - Rachel Hawkins
*Cast in Shadow - Michelle Sagara
Incarceron - Catherine Fisher
******Legend - Mary Lu
*Anna and the French Kiss - Stephanie Perkins
Delierium - Lauren Oliver
Prophecy of the Sisters - Michelle Zink
®Beastly - Alex Flinn
The Iron King - Julie Kagawa
*Lola and the Boy Next Door - Stephanie Perkins
The Demon King - Cinda Williams Chima
*The Son of Neptune - Rick Riordan
******Divergent - Veronica Roth
*Heist Society - Ally Carter
Entwined - Heather Dixon
Eon - Alison Goodman
The Throne of Fire - Rick Riordan
Across the Great Barrier - Patricia C. Wrede
Blood Red Road - Moira Young (I haven't quite finished this one yet, but I think I may get it finished before midnight tomorrow. And I started it in 2011, so I'm counting it).

Until I actually sat down and counted the books, I didn't think I'd read that many this year. The total is 28, which means I averaged 1.8 books read per week.

I think you can guess my favorites based on the list above, but just in case, they were Divergent and Legend. I really liked most of the books I read. But those two were absolutely the best of the best. And Divergent was by far my favorite of the year. I seriously considered rereading it multiple times.

Tell me what books you read this year. Have you read any (or all) of the books on my list? Which did you like the best?

The Center Didn't Hold

Okay, so the title is kind of lame, but I heard a Ferengi quote that line of that poem on Star Trek and I just couldn't resist. (Of course, it left me wondering how on DS:9 Quark could possibly know that line from that poem by Yeats, seeing as he despises all things hu-man, but now I'm just thinking too far into it.) (Bonus points for everyone who got both of those references before I explained.)

Anyway, the last time I posted was four months ago when I was attempting the BIAM a second time for a second story. Y'all might have guessed from my sudden silence that it did not go well. Actually, it all kind of fell apart. I think it was a combo of the story not being ready and the timing of the attempt. I realized halfway through that I had no idea where the story was going. I thought I did, but it took trying to write the story to completion to realize I had no idea where it was supposed to end or even what the characters were doing in the story. I didn't know why they were there or what they wanted or anything.Add to that the fact that my FT job got super crazy busy and you have a recipe for disaster. I just didn't have the time that I'd had with the other project. Things were just too busy and I couldn't dedicate the time I needed to to finish on time.

I also realized that I needed to reexamine the story and characters and figure out just what everything was about. Why did my antagonist do what he did? Why did my protagonists do what they did? Why did they feel about each other they way they did. So I took a month or so and just thought and did rough character sketches.

Finally, I found another system that seemed like it might work better with this story and started with it. And the good news, it worked pretty well. I'm still struggling here and there. But overall, I'm much happier with where this story is going than I was back in September. I currently drafting scenes and I'm really hoping with my vacation coming up I'll be able to finish the scene drafts by the end of the year.

I also feel kind of bad because I've been ignoring the whole online world for about four months now. I haven't been blogging, I haven't been on LWC, I've been on Facebook but not really posting. I just haven't been present, at all.

I really want to try and fix my terribly blogging habits, well really my terrible internet habits. Because let's face it, I'm really bad at having an online presence. But I want to try and be better. I even have a few ideas for some blog posts. And I'm officially asking for ideas. Anything y'all want me to post on, talk about, rant about, or comment on? I'll give it a try. I'm also going to try and post a few book reviews, though, I'm really bad at writing those. Still, I've been reading, so I might as well talk about what I'm reading.

So tell me what you want me to talk about. I'm going to try and post at least once a week. I can't guarantee what day or what time, but I'm gonna try.

Now, I'm gonna go, cause this is long enough as it is. :)

Book in a Month Redux: Days 5 through 8

So you might have noticed that I'm not posting as many blogs as I did the first time around. And you might be wondering why. I will explain.

Like most people, I'm crazy busy. Not that I have kids or anything so super life-consuming like that (though that would be nice). No. My business comes from everything else going on in my normal life. See I have a day job that I must work full time so that my hubby and I can actually make money and, you know, subsist. I also am incredibly active in my church, which means I have youth group on Wednesday (which I love), church on Sunday (which I also love), small group on Thursday (yup, love that too) and other random church events scattered throughout the month. Then there's the whole family/friends thing, which means making time to actually see them. Oh and I have to sleep and eat and write and exercise and, because of my joint issues, spend a lot of time resting my joints between all these activities because if I don't I can't do any of them. All that is to say, that as much as I love posting on my blog (now that I actually do, and kind of have something to write about), it is often the casualty of my hectic life. I will, of course, still post, but, at least for the foreseeable future,  it will only be every couple of days. :)

So, now that my guilt-fueled over-sharing has been taken care of, I bet you want to know how the writing's going, especially after the trouble I was having last week. The answer: it's going really well. I realized at some point last week that I was trying too hard to write something totally different from my original draft and it was making me lose my connection with the story. The original (unfinished) draft of the story was, for the most part, pretty decent, if rough. But I thought that I needed to write the same situations in a completely different way. Thus, the writers block.

Once I realized that I could incorporate the original ideas and dialogue and whatnot, tweaked to match-up with the new POV and changed to make a little more sense, the writing started flowing again. And that makes me super happy.

Sometimes I get so caught up in changing what I think are problems with my stories that I forget that sometimes I had some pretty decent ideas to begin with. And when I let myself get back to those ideas, under controlled circumstances, the story comes so much easier. :)

So here are the numbers for the past few days.

Pages Written for Days 5 through 8:  24

Total Pages thus Far: 48

Words: 6,179

Total Words thus Far: 12,579

Book in a Month Redux: Days 3 and 4

Life is busy so I couldn't post yesterday. Wednesdays are just generally crazy for me. I didn't even get all my pages written yesterday because of work and youth group. But I'm all caught up again now.

So I've discovered (or really rediscovered) something in this first writing week. Writing a whole new story is hard. Really hard. I keep finding myself feeling like this story isn't coming together at all. When I was writing the original version of it, it was pretty easy. But now, it feels all stilted and weird. It's not flowing like my last WIP did. I can't seem to get into the mode of wanting to write it like I was before.

I still like the story idea, but the actual story writing is really hard this time around for some reason. And I can't really figure out why.

But I'm pushing through it, writing even though it feels off somehow. I'll keep going and hopefully it will get smoother the further into the story that I get.

Do y'all ever have that happen with your writing? Where you start a story and think it's great, but then suddenly everything feels stiff and hard to write, like you're not connecting to it anymore? If so, what do you do?

So here are the numbers for the pas two days.

Pages: 12 

Total Pages thus Far: 24

Words: 3,364

Total Words thus Far: 6.612

Book in a Month Redux: Day 2

It's finally starting to feel like fall here. Whether it stays feeling that way is anybody's guess, but today it was pleasantly chilly. Days like today make me wish I could simply take a good book and go sit in the sun all day, enjoying the lovely weather before things get cold and nasty again.

But enough of my musings on weather. How goes the writing, you ask. It goes well. Of course, it's only the second day, so it better be going well. :)

Today I introduced my male lead character. His name is Keller Brydon, and can I just say that he's amazing. At least I think so. I think you will too, but hey, that's just me.

So I guess i could actually tell you a little about this story, couldn't I? Okay, I will.

My new story takes place in world rather different from my last WIP. In this world, magic is pretty commonplace. About half the county's population has some kind of magic, including my two main characters. The magic in this world differs from my previous story as well, because it's not elemental magic. This magic is all mental. Those with magic have visions, can see when some one is lying, can find someone using their mind, can sense things about people, and more. Every bit of the magic is mental. So no manipulating the natural forces, unless you have telekinesis or something like that.

So what kind of magic do Raelin and Keller have? Well, Raelin is a Seer. Keller, he's a Truth-Sayer, or Truth-Seer.

And that's all you get for now. I'll be posting a brief discription of the story on my Projects page sometime later this week. I just have to actually write it first. :)

Now for the numbers.

Pages: 6 

Total Pages thus Far:12

Words: 1,517

Total Words thus Far: 3,263

Book in a Month Redux: Day 1

Yup, I'm doing it again. And I'm blogging about it, again.

So, doing the book in a month for my other WIP worked so well, and left me feeling so great about getting it accomplished that I have decided to write another BIAM.

This time, I'm using BIAM to write another story that I've been stuck on for a couple of years. I got the idea a few years ago from, of all things, a dream I had. Since then, I've been fiddling with it here and there, but I've never actually written out the whole story.

That's what I'm going to do with BIAM this time. In the next four weeks, I will finally get the story down on paper and give it an ending.

This actually makes me kind of nervous. See, I've never written a story like this one. It has a bit of a crime solving element to it, and I'm not sure how that's going to work out. But I really want to try it, so that's what I'm going to do. The other worry I have is that I've only had this idea for a couple of years, not the decade that I had with my other story, so I haven't worked out the characters and plot quite as much as I did for my other story. That makes me nervous. But I think that's where the BIAM is going to help me out a bit. All the work sheets will help me figure out this idea better. And that's what I'm excited about.

So for day one, I'm supposed to write out a one sentence summary and complete a worksheet about my plot, characters, and setting for Act I. I haven't actually done this yet because I had to order another copy of the BIAM book and haven't gotten it yet. But don't worry, when the book gets here, I'll do all the worksheets.

So I bet you might be wondering what this other story is going to be about. Well, I don't want to give too much away, just because I'm weird like that. But I will tell you a little bit about it as I work on it through the month.

Today, I introduced my female lead. Her name is Raelin Tabra, and she is 16. That's all you get for now. :)

Now for the numbers (I'm only writing 6 pages per day, this time. I know that means the story will likely be shorter, but I feel like this first full draft is going to be shorter than the final product anyway. I'm focusing on getting the major points down, then I'll go back and add things like descriptions and smoother transitions and things like that).

Pages: 6 

Total Pages thus Far: 6

Words: 1,744

Total Words thus Far: 1,744 

Book in a Month: Days 21 to 30

So I finished the draft, and was so crazy busy with work and church that I didn't have a chance to post anything. So I'm posting now. And as a special treat, since this is my 50th post, I'll also be posting the first five pages of the draft. :)

First here are the final numbers.

Total Pages: 203

Total Words: 64,994

And now, the first five pages.

~~~

Chapter I

The Ring

The ring was warmer than usual that day, and had I not been dealing with my mother’s almost-complete meltdown, I probably would have paid more attention.

At first, it was a normal day. I had finished my schoolwork early, so I’d taken up residence on the couch and was reading my latest fantasy novel when I heard the sound of metal crashing onto our hardwood kitchen floor.

“Mom?” I asked, laying my book down, “Everything okay in there?”

“It’s fine Alana,” came her out-of-breath response, “I just dropped the baking sheet.”

I frowned. Most teens I know like when their mom bakes, if she’s as good at it as my mom is, but to me, the sound of my mom baking meant trouble. She almost never bakes just to bake, and there weren’t any church bake sales or fund raisers that I knew of, so she had to be upset about something. Because that’s really the only other time she bakes. She spent two weeks straight baking the year my dad walked out on us. And at least a day every time she talks to him.

With a sigh, I set my book down on the coffee table and hopped off the couch. Walking into the kitchen, I was greeted with the sight of my mother frantically stirring a bowl of what looked to be cookie dough. Oatmeal raisin by the smell.

“Whatcha making?” I asked, sliding onto the cabinet.

“Oatmeal raisin cookies,” she said, throwing me her best I’m-not-upset fake smile.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, ignoring the smile.

“Nothing. Why would something be wrong?”

“Because you only ever make messes like this when you are upset about something,” I said, glancing meaningfully at the pile of measuring spoons and cups, bowls, pans, and other baking ware in the sink and the now cooling batch of banana-nut bread on the opposite counter.

“That’s not true,” she insisted, then tried to blow a strand of her auburn hair out of her eyes. Reaching over, I tucked the stray hair behind her ear.

“Yes it is,” I said, “Now what’s up Mom?”

She didn’t answer right away, which was almost more of an answer really. She usually doesn’t like telling me what’s wrong, but she only ever tries to hide it when it’s caused by one person. But I waited, hoping I would be wring this time. I wasn’t.

“Your father called,” she finally said, starting to drop dollops of cookie dough onto waiting baking sheets. I felt myself take a sharp breath, involuntarily, but I still didn’t speak. She had more to say. “He’s doing well, apparently. He’s living in California now, working as a contractor for a big software company there.”

Mom sighed and fell silent, finishing the first pan and moving to the second. Without really thinking, I hopped off the counter and slid the pan into the oven, still waiting. Clearly it was something that was probably really going to piss me off, if my mom was still stalling.

“He wants to talk to you,” she finally said after she finished filling a second pan and moved to a third. She wasn’t facing me, but I saw her back and shoulders tense, waiting for me to snap.

“No,” I said, staring at her back. I didn’t yell. I didn’t have to. She knew the answer before she said anything.

“Why not?” she asked then, turning to face me, “It’s been five years. If I can forgive him—.” but I cut her off.

“I will never forgive him.” I still wasn’t yelling, but my mom flinched anyway, and that hurt. I hated when I hurt her. Too many other people had already hurt her; I didn’t want to be one of them. But when it came to my father, there would be no talking. It just wouldn’t happen.

“Honey,” she said, setting the bowl down, “I know you’re still mad, but I think maybe you should try talking to him. It might help.”

“No. I told you, I never want to talk to him again.”

“But he’s your father.”

“And he walked out on us. Abandoned us. You might be able to forgive that, but I can’t.”

“But Alana, honey.”

“No!” I shouted, then flinched and looked down. “No,” I said more quietly, “I am not talking to him.” Then I padded out of the kitchen and up the stairs, leaving my mom to her cookies.

Grabbing my book from the living room, I dashed up the stairs to my bedroom. Closing the door, I leaned against it and sighed. I hated these days, when my mom talked to him, and he made her wheedle me again. It used to only be once every few months, when he actually called again after he left, after the divorce. Then it was to be every two or three months. But ever since I’d turned sixteen, he’d called at least once a month. When I turned seventeen, it’d been every two weeks. He just couldn’t take the hint, couldn’t see that he was ruining the tenuous grip on happiness my mom and I had had since he left.

Opening my eyes, I checked the clock on my nightstand. It read 2:36. Sighing with relief, I walked over to my dresser and pulled out a pair of jeans and a T-shirt, changing from my pajamas. Being homeschooled had distinct advantages. Once I was dressed, I grabbed my keys and some shoes then headed back downstairs.

“I’m going to Lexi’s” I yelled, opening the front door, then dashing out. I didn’t feel like listening to my mom try and convince me that we needed to talk about my dad some more.

Lexi lived at the end of my street, so it didn’t take long to get there. Her green sub-compact was parked on the street, which meant she was actually home. Smiling, I ran the last few yards to her front porch.

I knocked once, then let myself in, yelling, “Hey Lex!”

“In the kitchen,” came her reply. I found my way there, finding my best friend with her homework spread out around her at the kitchen table. Plopping down in the seat next her, I glanced over the various text books and notebooks spread out around her.

“What’s up?” I asked, grabbing her history book and thumbing through it. I never got tired of looking at her books. Public school books were different from the ones my mom purchased from a homeschool curriculum vendor, so public school books always fascinated me.

“Massive social studies paper due tomorrow,” Lexi said, scribbling notes in one of her notebooks. “I should have started on this ages ago.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“Because, there are more important things than homework.”

“Unless you have a paper due. Then it’s the most important thing in the world.”

“What would you know about it? You’re homeschooled, remember?”

“Exactly. All I have is homework.” Lexi just stuck her tongue out at me.

We lapsed into silence for a while, her jotting down more notes as I flipped listlessly through her textbooks. At some point though, she must have noticed something was wrong.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, setting her pencil down.

“My dad called again,” I said, fiddling with the dog-eared corner of the page I had been looking at.

“Is your mom upset?”

“She baked a batch of banana-nut bread and was working on oatmeal raisin cookies when I left.”

“Ouch. What’d he want this time?”

“What else? He wants to talk. Like usual.”

“And you said no?”

“Obviously.”

“How’d your mom take it?”

“She tried to convince me otherwise, again.” I slapped the book closed. “But I don’t really want to talk about it. Tell me about your day.”

“You know, you really need to get your own life,” she said, smiling. I couldn’t help but smile too. Lexi’s smiles are infectious. Between that and her perfect tiny frame, it’s no wonder guys are always asking her out.

“I ran into Mark Jacobs today,” she said, shifting into her lets-talk-cute-boys mode, “he was talking to Leena Mills, which I don’t really get at all.”

We talked about Lexi’s day and fellow students for a while. Listening to her helped get my mind off of the argument with my mom. I knew I should go back and talk to her again, but I didn’t want to get into it again, so I just ignored the niggling guilt and lost myself in Lexi’s world.

“Oh!” she exclaimed sometime later, “I completely forgot!”

“What?” I asked, worried she needed to leave or something and I’d have to go back and face my mom again.

“Brandon found me as I was leaving today, before he went to soccer. He wanted me to tell you that he wanted to meet you at the old fort after practice.”

“He did?” I asked, staring at her, trying to decide if she was joking. She was known to tell me things that weren’t completely true just to get a laugh. It usually had to do with boys I didn’t know though. She knew I couldn’t take it if she toyed with me about Brandon. Anybody but Bran.

“Yup. I wonder what he wants to ask you. Isn’t the spring formal coming up in a few weeks?”

“Lexi shut up,” I practically squealed, something I never do, and playfully smacked her arm, “Don’t even joke about that. You know we’re just friends.”

“Not if you had it your way,” she said, waggling her eyebrows.

“Oh stop. We’ve known each other forever. You know that.”

“Exactly. You have to get together. Who else knows you so well?”

“You.”

“Yeah, but you’re not my type.” She grinned, and I just shook my head.

~~~

Enjoy. :)

Book in a Month: Day 21

I know I've missed a few days of posting and I'm not going to be posting numbers today. I just wanted to update and say that I am still writing. I'm over 50,000 words at this point and I think I'll be over 60k before the end of this week.

Also, my next post will be my 50th post on my blog. I'm going to try and do something special for it, though I don't know exactly what yet. I'll figure it out.

So until tomorrow.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Book in a Month: Day 18

Still a day behind, but that's okay. I'm not too worried about it.

It's hard to believe that I'm actually nearing the end of this BIAM. I still have a little over a week, but that's not really all that much considering how fast the rest of this month has gone. It's crazy to think that in as little as seven more days, I could have a completed draft of my story. It's awesome.

It also shows me that I can do this. I've always made writing a second priority, after so many other things. Now though, I see what I can do when I make it the main priority. When I actually set aside the time and make myself write, I can get a lot accomplished. It makes me want to do it again. :) And I love that feeling.

Okay, so here are today's numbers.

Pages: 8

Total Pages thus Far: 144

Words: 2,681

Total Words thus Far: 46,932

Alright, well I'm off to exercise.

Book in a Month: Day 17

So I am a day behind because yesterday wound up being crazy busy and I didn't get the chance to finish all eight pages. It's okay though. There are a couple extra days built in for just this reason. So it's all good.

I'm not going to post number today since I'm off a little bit from yesterday. I'll post number again tomorrow instead.

Book in a Month: Days 15 and 16

So I missed posting yesterday, mostly due to the fact that I've been exhausted. I barely got my pages in for the day, and just couldn't find the energy to write my blog post too. But I am remedying that now, sort of.

So I was reading through Natalie Whipple's blog (here) and found this awesome site called Ladies Who Critique. It is a site for women writers to connect to critique partners. Of course I had to join, because who could beat such a resource, and now I'm even more excited to be doing my BIAM project. Now I'll actually have something for people to critique. :) This site is exactly what I've been looking for for ages. I struggle with meeting new people (in life and on line) and so finding a site dedicated to helping me find other writers who have the same tastes and interests and might want to exchange writing with me is so amazing. If you're a writer and you're reading this, you should go check it out. I've already met a couple new people, despite being a major wallflower.

Now for today and yesterdays number. I'll give them to you combined.

Pages: 16

Total Pages thus Far: 128

Words: 5,414

Total Words thus Far: 41,379

With today's pages, I am officially over 40,000 words, in just about 2.5 weeks. Craziness! This is the most I've ever written in such a short time.

Book in a Month: Day 14

I'm still so exhausted from yesterday. I don't know what I did, but whatever it was my legs are more sore than they have been in months. I actually can't remember the last time I was this sore. It hurts to walk, to move. Sitting down and standing up are particularly painful.

And my hands are bothering me again. So I'm keeping this short. Just the numbers today. Here they are.

Pages: 8

Total Pages thus Far: 112

Words: 2,290

Total Words thus Far: 35,960

Book in a Month: Day 13

Just another quick post to update my numbers. I walked dogs today at the Humane Society, so I'm kind of pooped.

Here's the numbers.

Pages: 8

Total Pages thus Far: 104

Words: 2,711

Total Words thus Far: 33,670

Book in a Month: Day 12

Just another quick entry to update my numbers. Work was a pain today and my hands are really bothering me thanks to the typing and the weather. So here are the numbers:

Pages: 8

Total Pages thus Far: 96

Words: 2,863

Total Words thus Far: 30,959

I'll try and post a longer entry tomorrow.

P.S. I'm over 30,00 words! Yea!!!! And only about half done. This is awesome!

Book in a Month: Day 11

So I don't have any deep or abiding thoughts today. Work kind of sucked any of those out of me today. Though I did realize that I was actually ahead a bit on my page count. So I decided to take advantage of that and not write quite as much as I have been. It was a long day, so I needed a little lighter writing day. Which is why this is basically just the numbers today.

Here's the numbers:

Pages: 5

Total Pages thus Far: 88

Words: 1,437

Total Words thus Far: 28,096

Book in a Month: Day 10

Doubt is something I struggle with a lot, and not just in my writing. Doubting runs in my family. Every single person, my parents and my siblings, all struggle with massive amounts of doubt. We doubt different things about ourselves, but we all doubt something. For me, my doubt comes when I have to create something. Anything, be it a report, a story, an idea, a new method, I doubt it. I always have.

Doubt is something that every writer deals with. Will the story work? Will the characters be believable? Will people want to read what I write? These questions open the door for doubt, not because they are invalid questions, but because they are valid.

See that's the problem with doubt, worry, and questioning yourself. For me, it always has a basis in something valid. It's not wrong to double check your writing, your motivation, you choices. My problem is that I have a hard time getting out of the double-checking stage. Those creeping doubts cling to me, holding me back from actually letting myself achieve something.

What does this have to do with BIAM? Kind of everything. Doubt and fear is what's kept me from writing or rewriting or finishing a draft. I second guess myself right out of writing. So doing the BIAM has been incredibly helpful in that it doesn't let me stay in that place. I can doubt, but I have to keep writing. Question what I'm doing, but keep writing through those questions. Instead of letting myself get away with a someday goal, I have a concrete goal, 30 days. And that means there's no time for wallowing in self-doubt.

Sure I might not totally like the result. But I'll have finished the draft, and that will give me that much more strength against that doubt. And next time, maybe I won't have as many doubts.

Now for the numbers:

Pages: 8

Total Pages thus Far: 83

Words: 2,761

Total Words thus Far: 26,656

Book in a Month: Day 9

Normally I would publish this later in the day, since I usually work late on Tuesdays. But I wasn't feeling well today, so I didn't go into work today. Thus, an earlier posting from me today.

I completed another eight pages today. And as usual, middles are hard. Starting is easy. I've started a bunch of stories. It getting through the middle that's the hardest part. Which, I guess, isn't a surprise.

Anyway, I was thinking about what I wanted to write in this post today, and I couldn't really decide. I thought about writing about my doubts as a writer (I have plenty of those), or maybe writing a character introduction. Another idea was to write about how reading inspires me. But none of them seemed really all that interesting to me today. Maybe I'll write about one of those tomorrow.

For now, I will simply publish my numbers for the day.

Pages: 8

Total Pages thus Far: 75

Words: 2,394

Total Words thus Far: 23,895

Book in a Month: Day 8

I'm not sure what to write today. I've moved into the second week of the BIAM program. That means technically I'm supposed to be in Act II of my story. I think I am, but I've never been good at the whole three act structure. I could probably identify it in other books, but in my own stuff, not sure I can.

Of course, I've always been terrible at self evaluation.

Oh well. I'll think of something better to write tomorrow. For now, here are the numbers.

Pages: 8.5

Total Pages thus Far: 68

Words: 2,719

Total Words thus Far: 21,505

Book in a Month: Day 7

Just the numbers for today. I don't have anything witty or interesting to say today. So here they are.

Pages: 8.1

Total Pages thus Far: 60

Words: 2,482

Total Words thus Far: 18,786

Book in a Month: Day 6

It was harder to write today than it has been the past few days. I think mostly because it's Saturday and I take a break from everything work/writing related on the weekends. But I made myself write, though I split up the time. I wrote some before I went to the Humane Society (I volunteer there on Saturdays. I walk dogs. :) and the rest after I got home.

Today I got to write my first magic lesson scene. Which I wasn't planning on writing, but I really liked it. I am officially getting to the middle of the book, and that is the hardest part. It's the least concrete. I'm struggling with what exactly I want to keep from the previous draft, while still making it interesting. I think I've figured it out, but I'm not totally sure. I'll let you know.

Anyway, I wrote about magic today. My character is having to learn to use the magic she's been born into, and it's not going to be easy. I'm actually excited about this because I've change my magic system a bit from the original idea. I hope it turns out well, but I'm pretty sure it will.

Now for the numbers:

Pages: 8.1

Total Pages thus Far: 52

Words: 2,672

Total Words thus Far: 16.305

Book in a Month: Day 5

This is just a quick update to publish my numbers from today. I was going to write up an actual entry today, but got distracted by life.

So here are the numbers:

Pages: 8

Total Pages thus Far: 44

Words: 2,127

Total Words thus Far: 13,633

Book in a Month: Day 4

I hate conflict. It's a fact. If there's conflict, I run screaming the other way. Well okay, I actually slink silently the other way in hopes of avoiding the conflict, but you get the idea. This is a bad thing for a writer.

Conflict is the staple of a story. Without conflict, there is no story. So how do I, as an avid flee-er of conflict, put it into my stories? Good question. It's one I'm still figuring out actually.

When I was younger and was just writing because I loved making stories up, I didn't really get that I needed conflict. Or, rather, I didn't get that I needed lots of conflict. I didn't understand that the big conflict wasn't enough, that everything in the story need to conflict with the protagonist. Everything has to go against her and make it harder for her to get to her goal. Or almost everything.

I thought it was enough to just have the journey be the conflict. And to be honest, I was scared of hurting my protagonists. I was worried that if it was too hard, they wouldn't actually make it too the end.

But as I've gotten older, and read more great books, I've realized that there must be more conflict or there's no point in getting to the end. Things have to be hard, or my protagonists aren't going to need to get to the end to get the resolution. Without the hardship, the hurt, the pain in all its forms, the resolution isn't a resolution. And a story isn't a story. Or it isn't a good one.

That's what I've been learning with this rewrite. So, I'm trying to be more conflicted. It's not easy, but the more I try, the more I realize that it's actually kind of fun to throw things at my protagonist. She's strong. She can handle it. Or, if she can't she'll learn from her scars.

Anyway, today I wrote eight more chapters. Here are the numbers:

Pages: 8

Total Pages thus Far: 34

Words: 2,479

Total Words thus Far: 10,987

Book in a Month: Day 3

Day three is done. Fitting in the time to write isn't easy, but it helps that I broke it up throughout the day. Work was slow, so I took a few breaks and wrote then. I just now finished up that last of the pages before youth group started.

I have to say, I'm only on day three and I already feel really accomplished. Sitting down and actually meeting a goal, even a small one like writing eight pages a day, makes me feel pretty good. And seeing those pages add up is really great feeling. I'm already up to 26 pages. Which is awesome cause normally it takes me forever to get that many pages, but now they're just piling up

But my wrists are hurting, so I'm going to cut this post short. Here are the numbers:

Pages: 8.5

Total Pages thus Far: 25

Words: 2,903

Total Words thus Far: 8,490

Book in a Month: Day 2

Writing eight or nine full pages in one sitting is HARD! Okay that sounds ridiculous, but it's true. And not because I have writer's block. Granted, every once in a while I get a little stuck trying to figure out exactly what to say next. But that usually passes very quickly. The most difficult parts are the actual typing and the not going back to rewrite stuff as I go. Why?

The rewriting part is hard because I am a re-writer. I write something, then decide, no that doesn't sound right, so I rewrite it. But then it doesn't mesh with something I'd written before, so I have to go and rewrite that earlier bit. And so on. This can really detract from forward progress (which is probably why it takes me so long to finish anything). But I do it so readily that not rewriting as I go is really hard. Really, really hard.

The other thing, the typing, that's just hard cause it hurts. Literally. My hands don't do so well with extended periods of typing. Or really any repetitive motion. They start hurting really quickly. So I have to rest them. But if I rest them, then I lose the momentum I had been building up and that stinks as much as the pain does. So it's always a game of how long can I push myself before the pain just becomes too overwhelming.

But enough of the boring downer stuff. Here's today's numbers.

Pages: 8.5

Total Pages thus Far: 16.5

Words: 2,977

Total Words thus Far: 5,587

I'd say it was a good writing day. :)

Book in a Month: Day 1

So I started this thing today called Book in a Month. I'm going to write an entire draft in 30 days. I decided to do this, mostly to see if I could, but also because it's a great way for my to get a draft done quickly. It's (hopefully) going to help me buckle down and get the draft done in an actual, measurable amount of time. I have to focus and write a particular amount each day to accomplish this in 30 days. I'm excited and super nervous about this.

So what am I writing this month? I've decided to give this first try to my first full novel that I ever wrote. I am rewriting it in first person and changing some of the plot elements. This is an attempt to make the story flow better. Doing it in thirty days makes me feel like I won't have wasted too much time if I wind up hating what results from this. It's only a month.

As for my daily goal, it's to write a minimum of eight pages per day for the entire month. I've already written my eight pages for today, and they felt pretty good, though it was a little difficult to write for eight pages without getting distracted or giving up. But I think the longer I do this, the easier it will get. At least I hope so.

The results of my day today -

Pages: 8

Total Pages thus Far: 8

Words: 2,607

Total Words thus Far: 2,607

I will update this count daily, just so I have something to keep me accountable.

Long Day of Nothing . . . Sort Of

I hate those days when I feel like I have accomplished absolutely nothing at work. The days when I only close out one or two or three projects and it's taken me the entire day to get in touch with a consultant or two. And of course, today was one of those days.

But complaining about my day job seems some what pointless. These days will inevitably happen. I just wish less occurred less frequently.

In other news, I'm working on character stuff again. This time it's for my contemporary fiction story. I found this great character tool a while ago and just rediscovered it. I've been using it to get a better handle on my characters. Creating normal but interesting people is kind of hard. I'm used to building characters around some bit of magic or another. I don't have that in this story.

But now that I think about it, maybe that is a good thing. Honestly, these characters feel more like they have personalities than my fantasy characters. Maybe I should do this more often.

Ah well, enough of me boring you with my musings on characters you may never meet. I'm off to watch more Star Trek (the original series, since I've never actually seen all of those) and muse some more.

It's Been a While

As I've stated many time before, I'm kind of bad at keeping up with this blog. It's so easy for me to get distracted by other things (the Sims, watching Netflix, earning a living) that I often just don't feel like posting. There's also the issue of not really being sure what to write about.

That's actually my biggest obstacle. If I actually felt like I had something worth saying, I'd probably post more. Generally, though, I don't feel as if I have much to say.

As of late I've been working on a new project (when I'm not traveling to Italy. Well, actually I only did that once, but still, it was Italy). I needed a break from my first WIP. Time to be away from it. Time to get some distance. So I've decided to step back for a while and work on a couple of other ideas that I've had for a while.

The problem I'm facing at the moment is trying to decide how to spend my writing time. I really want to work on my new fantasy project, but I also find myself being drawn back to a contemporary project that is far more lighthearted than any of my fantasy. It's fun to write in my sarcastic voice. I wish I could figure out a way to bring that voice to my fantasy. I think it would make it more interesting.

Anyway, that's what I'm working on at this point. That and my day job.

I will try and write more often. Struggle though I might, I know it's important.

Is it Time to Move On?

By move on, of course I mean, start fully focusing on another project. This is a question I've been asking myself for months now. I'm not sure what the answer is.

Why am I thinking about this. Well, let's face it. I've been working on one story for something like ten years, and honestly, it's not any closer to being published now than it was a few years ago. It needs an overhaul, or at least I think it needs an overhaul. But I just can seem to see it clearly anymore. I've spent so much time caught up in it's world that i can't get out of it. And I'm not sure that's a good thing. Not being able to see it clearly means I can't do the story justice.

The second reason is that I haven't finished anything else in all these years. Not a real novel length story at least. I've written some short stories and started a few novel length ideas. But I haven't finished another book yet. And I really need to. I need to be able to write more than one book. And it's pretty much a given that your first book almost never gets published. Sad, but true.

But this is really hard for me. I love this book. I love the characters and the story and the entire concept. It's been my baby for so long that I'm honestly scared to call it quits. I find myself thinking that I won't be able to finish or come close to finishing anything else. I fear getting stuck and never getting published.

But the more I think about it, the more I think it's necessary. As i said before, i can't see it clearly anymore. I am stumbling around trying to find the right way to write it, and I can't, at least not right now.

So I think it's time to say farewell to this project for now. As much as I love it, I know I can't give it what it needs right now. So it goes on the shelf, and it's time to turn to something else. Perhaps, hopefully, one day I'll be able to come back to it and make it the amazing story I know it is. I just can't do that right now. So I'm moving on.

Life and Creating New Characters

Who knew that writing could cause physical pain. Oh sure, I spend so much time trying to figure out the right thing to write next, how my characters work together, reworking plots, and everything else about writing, that I sometimes forget that writing can be kind of hard on me physically. I don't generally mention this to most people, though, because, like everything having to do with my health, I hate talking about it. But lately, it's really been getting in the way, which is part of why I don't update this blog as regularly as I'd like. I spend eight or more hours per day writing up reports at my day job, that I often have trouble typing more when I get home or finish my work for the day. Thus, I have not been writing as much as I'd like too. *sigh* But enough of my physical issues. How about some writing ones.

I am attempting to work on a new story idea that is unconnected to my current WIP. I've had the idea for a year or two now, but I've just started working on the characters and plot lines. It's kind of exciting because, though it's a fantasy, it's also another genre that I've never thought about working in before. It's kind of exciting, but a little stressful as well. It's difficult, but I'm very excited about what will hopefully come of this. As usual I have no title (I'm really terrible at those), but hopefully one will come to me as I go. I'm also excited because I'm thinking of setting the story in a culture similar to the Byzantium Empire. Of course, this means lots of research, but I like researching stuff.

So know I'm going to give my poor wrists a rest, and possibly do some more research on Byzantium and this other genre.

Later.

Sarcasm, First Person, and Big Edits

So the title of this blog may be a little confusing. How, you ask, can all those things go together? Well, they don't, necessarily, unless your me. And the big edits doesn't really go at all, but I wanted three subjects for my title, so there you go. :)

As for how sarcasm and first person go together, at least for me, let me explain. It's something I've been noticing more and more about my writing. When it comes to writing a story in the third person perspective, I find it infinitely more difficult for my characters to be sarcastic than it is for them to be sarcastic in the stories that are in first person. I haven't totally figured out why that is, but I have a theory. When I'm writing in third person, I find I'm not really writing in the character's voice so much. There is a voice there, and it's always limited to what's going on with the character that's the focus of that particular scene or story, but their thoughts (sarcastic or otherwise) tend to get left in their heads, or only seen through physical action. And for me it's very hard to be sarcastic in physical action without doing the same thing over and over. I'm still learning different ways to show my sarcastic side, physically speaking. I raise an eyebrow, smirk, roll my eyes, and I'm sure many other things, but it's always the same. And being the sarcastic person I am, those actions happen over and over again throughout the day. If I were to do this in writing, it would get really monotonous really fast, don't you think?

This, however, is not as much of a factor when I'm writing in first person, mostly because I'm inside my character's head. That means I can be sarcastic in the way they think as much as in the way they talk. They don't have to say their witty remarks out loud. They can just think them, and since they are narrating, can tell the audience them, without those remarks having to be heard by the other characters. Thus my 1stP characters tend to be far snarkier (that's a word right?) than my 3rdP characters. And I kind of like that. But that's just me.

As for big edits, I still haven't started mine yet. Almost there, but there's still work to do polishing the latest draft of the novel. I will, of course, keep you updated.

Now I'm off to do some work at my day job. The research is never done. :)

Plot and Major Changes to Mine

I have discovered that I may have a serious plot problem. This kind of sucks.

What, you may ask, could that problem be? It is that I think I have major events happening in the wrong order and too close together. This equals massive reworking of the whole middle section of my novel. That, understandably, scares the crap out of me.

Why? Well mostly cause I'm not the best with change. I kind of try to avoid it. Like the plague. And here as I'm trying to work out the plot for a completely different story I discover possible major issues the book I thought I was almost finished with. I almost wanted to cry when I came to this conclusion.

See I love my book kind of the way it is. It's taken years to get it to this point, to where it's feeling close to being finished finally. And then I start reading about plot, and I realize, maybe I do need to reorder those two major scenes in the middle. And the idea of having to take those two scenes and swap them after rewriting them to work in their new place and rewriting all the transitions between the scenes, is a daunting idea. So daunting I haven't been able to look at my WIP in a couple of days.

So what am I going to do, you ask. Well I could be a wuss and say nothing, but we both know that's a cop-out. So instead I'm going to do the hard thing. I'm going to finish this draft (Numero 6) including the big chunks I haven't worked on yet. Then, once that's finished, I'm going to give it to my friend who's read two of the other drafts along with the new crit partner I hope to be finding soon (thanks to Natalie Whipple and her fantastic Crit Partner Classifieds), then begin the massive rewrite for draft number 7 while they read it. Once that's done, I'll have them read #7 and see which is the better layout for the story.

It's a seriously frightening prospect, especially because I may do all that work for nothing. But after thinking over it for a couple of days, it's feeling more and more like what I need to do. So I'm going to do it.

So that's my thought for the day. Now I'm off to write or something.

Lost, Edits, and Snow

It's been a while. It's February, and my edits are still unfinished. But that's okay. I've decided that it's okay if I don't get my edits done in time for the conference. I tend to push myself too hard then get frustrated when I balk and don't meet my goals. I'm great at meeting goals for other people, but when it comes to personal stuff, I find it hard to keep pushing myself.

That being said, I am going to be done with this edit by the end of the month at the latest. I want to be able to show it to a crit partner (assuming I can find one) starting in March. Then more edits. Maybe this summer I'll start the query process, but I don't want to commit to too much, so that's still a maybe. I really want to, but I'm not going to send the manuscript out before it's ready.

Meanwhile, I've been watching Lost for some inexplicable reason. I started it last week and can't seem to stop watching it. I can't say that I like the show, but I don't hate it either. It's mostly just that I can't stop watching, like an accident or something. So I keep watching, trying to figure out why I can't stop and why I want to know what happens next.

Oh yeah, and we in St. Louis have been hit with a massive winter storm. So I'm stuck at home. My car is frozen with a 1/2 inch of ice and I've been working from home for two days. I probably will continue to do so for at least one day, if not two.

So I'm off to do more edits, watch some more lost, and do some more work.

The New Year and an Update on the WIP

Two weeks into the new year and it already feels like forever. And I'm not sure if I mean that in the good way or the bad way.

The new year also means that I am now less than 90 days until I attend my first writer's conference. To say that I am nervous is something of an understatement. I've been attempting to figure out what exactly to expect, but I'm starting to think that I'm not going to be prepared for it. Honestly, the idea of voluntarily going to a place jam packed with lots of other people (even other writer people) is scary. Have I ever mentioned that I strongly dislike crowds? No. Well it's true. Crowds actually kind of scare me. And here I am, excited about participating in an event designed to draw a crowd.

So where does my WIP stand in reference to this conference? Well I'm about half-way through my sixth draft, minus the really big changes. I just split a chapter into two chapters because it was just too bulky. So now it's split into chapters 8 and 9. my goal is to have this draft done by the end of January. Then I'm either going to do another draft myself, or possibly join a critique group through Writers Digest. I'm not sure yet. I know I need another set of eyes to look through the book, but I'm kind of limited on writer friends.

Another interesting bit about the novel; I now have over 71,000 words in it. This whole adding description and emotion and world-building stuff is actually kind of fun, and seriously beefs up the word count in a good way.

So my goals are as follows: Finish 6th draft by end of January. Finish 7th draft by end of March.

I'll let you know how I'm doing on these goals.

Now back to work.